DON’T DELAY!

 “To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing.”

What is the cause of our frequent delays, and is there really more to it than laziness or fear? Carleton University researcher Timothy Pychyl studies procrastination and believes to understand it we must take into account “self-defeating behavior including: emotions, self-regulation, the role of personality interacting with situation and how we perceive reward.”

Here are some tips to increase productivity gleaned from the expertise of Pychyl and other experts on the topic.

1. Ditch the Nike Cliche.

To combat the tendency to put things off, expert and author of The Now Habit (2007) Neil Fiore suggests transforming the thought “I don’t want to” into “I wonder what will come?” Sound simple? This sort of attitude adjustment is powerful. In a sense, the subtle shift in mindset tricks the brain into a more productive mode.

Another effective shift in thinking is switching from the attitude “Just do it” to “Just get started.” Carleton University researcher Timothy Pychyl (2008) conducted a series of studies on procrastination and found that the participant’s perception of the tasks they needed to get done was significant. Once we get started on a task, it’s rarely as bad as we thought. The phrase “Just get started” was more powerful in helping participants see the thing they wanted to do was not really that frightening.

And it’s okay if the task doesn’t get finished right away. As Pychyl writes “Even if we don't finish the task, we have done something, and the next day our attributions about self are not nearly as negative. We feel more in control and more optimistic. You might even say we have a little momentum.”

Pychyl’s 2010 study revealed that to stop putting off a task, forgiving onesself is effective to stop procrastinating. When you self-forgive, the chance you will delay getting down to business in the future will decrease. Apparently, the negative emotions surrounding the task are eased with forgiveness.

It may also be helpful to talk to your child about how perfectionism robs productivity. Kids need to be reminded it is okay to make mistakes so explain “not perfect” is altogether different from “fail.”

One of the best ways to help them become more comfortable with accepting mistakes is through modeling. Seeing a parent acknowledge their own daily errors (and responding with humor and compassion for the missteps) is both a gift and permission to be more accepting.

3. Think small & remove the STING.

Emmett recommends helping children break overwhelming tasks into smaller chunks. If your child has an upcoming test and simply cannot get the gears in motion to prepare, help her get organized. Look at the task of test preparation as a series of baby steps. Help her make a short list for a plan of attack.

A great strategy for older kids and their parents from Emmett’s book:

*Select a task you’ve been putting off.

*Time yourself and take one hour to accomplish the task.

*Ignore everything around you, such as the phone and other tasks

*No breaks.

*Give yourself a reward once the task is complete.

4. Set expectations & Write it down.

Parents can influence their children’s productivity by setting firm rules at home, offering rewards, and making lists. The basic rule of “No TV until your homework or housework is done” is an obvious place to begin to curb the procrastination. Screen time can be suspended or offered as a reward for successful time management.

Make lists for everything so there can be no excuses. Adolescents are especially prone to selective memory even when rules are clearly articulated. Notes are more effective than nagging for gentle reminders of chores, appointments and expectations.

Hopefully these suggestions will help you feel proactive in helping your children develop better habits that will serve them well through adulthood.

Resources:

Fiore, Neil. 2007. The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play. Tarcher.

Pychyl, T.A. Don’t Delay: Understanding Procrastination and How to Achieve Your Goals. Psychology Today. March 26, 2008.

Wohl, M.J.A., Pychyl, T.A., & Bennet, S.H. (2010). I forgive myself, now I can study: How self-forgiveness for procrastinating can reduce future procrastination. Personality and Individual Differences, 48, 803-808.